The Not So Secret Origin

As I was about to celebrate the release of Pheng iu (Volume 1) five years ago earlier this month, I dusted off the unreleased story of Pheng iu for this special occasion. I smiled and chuckled when I did the proofreading, simply because I found it hard to believe at times that this piece of nonsense was actually written by me. It felt like a lifetime ago since I last did such stuff. It was kind of nostalgic that it got me reminiscing and digging further into the treasure trove. 

Looking back, I realized that since I was a kid, I always had a knack for telling stories that evolved around me at that time. I used to play with my action figures just to act out the stories, from Tiger Wong (the old Lóng Hǔ Mén) to Final Fight (the side-scrolling, beat-'em-all video game, my all time favorite), usually with my loyal brother as the only audience. The routine stopped as it became increasingly embarrassing to do so, thanks to my grandfather's constant teasing. That's when I switched to another medium that allowed me to continue my passion.

As briefly mentioned in the Artworks, I thought I was into comics in 1995. I was wrong. Thanks to the well documented information in Sentimental Journey, I just rediscovered that I started a year earlier in 1994. After reading the timeline that I wrote back in 2001, I recall now that the comics craze was started with Sonic the Hedgehog pencil sketches. The drawing was awful, but it was fun and I craved for more since that moment onwards. I also vaguely remember that I did Dick Tracy as well during that period, although I totally have no recollection of how it turned out to be. Perhaps it was just a one page thing. I have no idea, really.

The main piece of work I was doing then was Mega Man. I came up with my own story and drew it myself. It was heavily inspired by Tiger Wong, hence the muscular characters and the fighting style that was mixed with occasional use of Mega Man's own Mega Buster, producing a result that was somewhat similar with Dragon Ball Z. It was exciting for a while, but because I wasn't any good in drawing, I always struggled and had a hard time catching up with the flowing ideas. Frustrated, I eventually abandoned the whole thing.

It didn't stop there and then, apparently. Upon learning that the drawing part hindered my progress, I did the storytelling only in the form of writing but, alas, of all the stories I could have started with, I wrote a love story. I mean, as a teenager, love story was not cool! It was just my luck that I was so inspired by the Chinese drama I was watching and what was the supposed to be the last thing done by a teenage boy became the first short story I ever penned down, literally, on a piece of paper. It was called Simfoni Kehidupan, retitled as the Chinese Love Story during its inclusion in Sentimental Journey.

Sentimental Journey, the Beatlestories (hand-drawn by yours truly) and the New Legend of Superheroes.

I thought it was corny. I was neither proud nor confident about it, but still I got the one and only original handwritten copy circulated around. Friends like Eday and Lisna encouraged me to carry on, which was very nice of them. Not long after that, I churned out another one, this time a comedy. That one felt more natural to me. I was at ease, having the time of my life and I began adopting the moniker Anthony Ventura. No, not from Ace Ventura, but from the name that I always saw on vinyls owned by my father.

I wrote a number of short stories during that period. Some were the finest then (Pompeii included, even though it was a, uh, love story), others were downright horrible. That was also the time when I first noticed that I couldn't really write based on requests from others. Imagine an artist that draws other people's face upon request. I did that, too, but the results weren't satisfying, at least to me. It somehow felt like very restrictive and the creativity just didn't develop well due to it, therefore the quality suffered. It worked best for me when it was my own stuff, a lesson that I learnt after many attempts of writing for others.

Another thing worth mentioning is, while I am capable of crafting stories from the scratch, I have this tendency of picking up what is funny around me, touch it up and repackage it into something that is entirely me. I often think that it's due to my keen sense of humor, which enables me to see ordinary stuff in a different light and laugh about it. Just my way of appreciating the irony in life, I suppose?

JKK, a parody of Justice League à la Kalbe, the silliest and the most useless incarnation ever.
Image credit: Kent August

Anyway, after brushing up my skills for a couple of years, I progressed from short stories to books (and wrote them on a computer as opposed to handwriting). The results were as random as they could be: two compilations of the previous short stories (Sentimental Journey, part 1 and 2), a bunch of new short stories with the same theme cobbled together (the Beatlestories, for example), two collections of poems, the fake monthly newspapers, a movie script (this was Andy William's project that was canned in the end), a play (it was performed in an event organized by Kalbe, the company I worked at), an interactive piece of nonsense where you could select your favorite characters and complete their adventures by choosing the multiple options that would bring you jumping all over the pages (JKK: Edisi Petualangan), two motivational books based on the lyrics of famous songs and, finally, normal books with one single storyline divided in multiple chapters such as the Battle of Destiny. Oh, there was even a trilogy called the Secret of Sephiroth, but only two out of three books were ever completed, haha.

Monster-Mania, one of the many Godzilla fan fictions I ever wrote.

1998-2006 was an insanely productive era! Apart from what was described above, I also wrote a couple of songs with my friend Ardian. You see, I had a band or two and at least one guitarist that I highly admired, but Ardian was a down-to-earth guy with under-utilized talents that he was approachable for me to work with. As a songwriting team, we split the tasks naturally, ie. he handled the music and I took care of the lyrics. We used tape recorder at first, then digitally re-recorded the same stuff using computer a few years later. The last time we got together to write a song was, perhaps, around year 2007. We wrote Friends Forever, which was supposed to be the soundtrack of Pheng iu #3. As a duo, we did perform our stuff to public at least once during the Christmas event (and we wrote Christmas song so that we were qualified to register, haha).

Friends Forever, in what was meant to be Pheng iu #3.

Still within the period was the book publication that happened twice in 2005. Now this was rather interesting. When I started writing, I didn't write with a commercial mindset that it would eventually get published. Most of the time, it was done because I felt like doing it and I enjoyed the process. Only after the work was finished that I'd read it as a common reader and, more often than not, the outcome tended to be for personal consumption or limited audience. Yet there were some materials that were pure comedy, the ones that could be enjoyed as easy reading by many. 

Crazy Campus, originally titled as Happy Campus, was one of those. It was about the four main characters, together with their classmates, wrecking havoc during their stay at the university in the fictitious Newtown City (yeah, I created the whole city long before this and most of my stories took place here). The series was inspired by my experience as computer lab assistant when I was in college and I did around 40 standalone chapters. When I moved to Jakarta, I picked up the best ones and submitted them as a book. Much to my delight, I got the deal. That was the first time I ever signed a contract with a publisher, albeit the indie one. 3000 copies were printed for the first round and another 3000 were printed subsequently. 

Half a year later, the second book, Hong Kong Heroes, was published. This one got me worried about copyright infringement due to the similarity between the characters and the real life people. As I mentioned earlier, when I wrote books, I did it mostly just for fun. In this case, Hong Kong Heroes was supposed to be some sort of fan fiction only. It featured Stephen Chow, Andy Lau, Jackie Chan, Jet Li and Chow Yun Fat reprising their roles from their movies, defending Hong Kong from the clutch of mafia led by Al Pacino, therefore I was understandably reluctant in publishing the book, but I was convinced that there wouldn't be any issue.

The original Hong Kong Heroes: 2001 and 2003.
Image credit: Jun Fui (Hong Kong Heroes 2003)

Were Crazy Campus and Hong Kong Heroes bestsellers? I'm afraid not. Judging from how they were written, I tend to think that you either like them or hate them. In term of success, Hong Kong Heroes didn't get any reprint, so only less than 3000 copies were sold. Due to the poor reception, the sequel (yes, there were actually two, Hong Kong Heroes 2001 and 2003) wasn't released. Talk about royalties, they were quite substantial then, came handy at the right time to cover my expenses when I first migrated to Singapore later on that year.

The Secret of Sephiroth was written at the end of an era. It was a fantasy story influenced by both Harry Potter and the Lords of the Rings. I was also reading Tarzan by Edgar Rice Burroughs at that time and, as much as I was fascinated by Tarzan, I disliked the one line description about the fight. I thought, as a reader, I would like to know the details, hence the battle scenes in my story were long and illustrative. If I recall it correctly, I met a guy who edited the Bahasa Indonesia edition of Winnetou and he requested several changes (this explained why the first part of the saga has the original and alternate version), but no deal was materialized. The trilogy, with the total of around 800 pages' worth of story so far, was left unfinished.

The map from the Secret of Sephiroth.
Image credit: Kent August

Then the life changing decision happened. I moved to Singapore and started anew. While I was looking for a job, I dreamt of doing a short film. That's when Pheng iu, which means "friend" and originated from the phrase often used by Sudarpo, was born. With a little help from my friends, I wrote the screenplay, I directed and shot the scenes and I post-produced the whole thing. The first flick was pretty much a test, but not without its memorable moments (I especially cherish the dancing scene, the first outdoor shooting we ever did). The second one was more of a decent short film. The third one, which was supposed to be the best and directed by the far more capable Andy William, stopped half way due to camera faulty and died a quiet death. Nevertheless, Pheng iu as a bunch of characters found a new life soon after that, this time in the written form. I happened to discover the self-publishing website and, after a decision to retire the pseudonym, Pheng iu (Volume 1) by Anthony Robinson appeared on Amazon.com.

That was the last hurrah before the five year hiatus. When my daughter was born, I thought it was time to call it quit and move on. It was fun while it lasted and all good things must come to end, no? The writer in me was long buried until 2017, when I curiously installed the Blogger application on my trusted BlackBerry Priv. 

It feels good to be back! It's been a long way since I first started. I had survived the handwriting era, I had done it for the longest time on computers and now, relying heavily on the addictive BlackBerry keyboards (KEYone, here I come!), I'm a writer on the go! This man has stories to tell and he's here to stay!

The Big Three: Crazy Campus, Hong Kong Heroes and Pheng iu (Volume 1).

Asal-Usul Roadblog101

Sewaktu saya hendak merayakan terbitnya novel komedi Pheng iu (Volume 1) lima tahun yang lalu, saya mengeluarkan cerita Pheng iu yang belum pernah ditulis sebelumnya. Saya tersenyum dan tertawa kecil saat membacanya kembali, sebab sulit rasanya untuk percaya bahwa karangan sekonyol ini ditulis oleh saya. Rasanya seperti sudah begitu lama sejak saya menulis dengan imajinasi seliar itu. Saya jadi terbawa suasana untuk bernostalgia.  

Kalau saya lihat kembali, saya sudah gemar bercerita dari sejak kecil. Saya sering menggunakan mainan figur aksi yang saya miliki, misalnya kura-kura ninja, untuk memerankan tokoh dari beraneka cerita, mulai dari Tiger Wong sampai Final Fight (video game di Orbit Wonderland). Penonton setia saya di kala itu adalah adik saya. Hobi ini akhirnya saya hentikan karena kian terasa memalukan seiring dengan bertambahnya umur saya. Oleh karena itu saya pun pindah ke medium lain yang lebih cocok untuk bercerita. 

Seperti yang disinggung secara singkat the Artworks, saya mengira kiprah saya di dunia komik dimulai tahun 1995. Namun setelah saya cek lagi informasi yang ada di Sentimental Journey, saya baru menyadari bahwa saya mulai setahun lebih awal di tahun 1994. Semuanya bermula dari sketsa pensil Sonic the Hedgehog. Gambarnya luar biasa buruk, tapi perasaan saat berkarya itu terasa menyenangkan dan membuat saya berkecimpung di dunia komik. Samar-samar saya juga ingat bahwa saya pernah mengerjakan Dick Tracy pada saat itu, tapi entah bagaimana hasilnya. Mungkin hanya satu halaman, hehe.  

Karya utama pada era komik adalah Mega Man. Saya membuat cerita sendiri dan menggambarnya. Terinspirasi oleh Tiger Wong, jagoannya berotot dan bertarung secara fisik sambil diselingi tembakan Mega Buster. Hasilnya mirip seperti Dragon Ball Z. Pada awalnya terasa seru, tapi karena saya tidak pandai menggambar, karya ini berjalan lambat dan tidak sepadan dengan cepatnya ide yang mengalir. Karena frustrasi, saya lantas berhenti dari dunia komik. 

Saat menyadari bahwa kemampuan menggambar saya tidak cukup, saya kemudian berfokus pada cerita saja, kali ini dalam bentuk tulisan. Meski akhirnya saya lebih banyak menghasilkan cerita komedi, cerita pendek pertama yang saya tulis justru bertemakan cinta. Ketika masih remaja SMA, rasanya cerita cinta itu menggelikan untuk ditulis oleh seorang cowok! Akan tetapi saat itu saya sedang menonton serial drama Mandarin yang berjudul Sanggar Kenangan dan saya tergerak untuk menulis cerita serupa. Cerita ini berjudul Simfoni Kehidupan dan kemudian diubah menjadi Chinese Love Story saat dirangkum dalam Sentimental Journey.

Sentimental Journey, the Beatlestories (yang saya gambar sendiri) dan the New Legend of Superheroes.

Saya tidak bangga atau bahkan percaya diri dengan hasil karya perdana ini, tapi saya tetap mengedarkan cerpen tulisan tangan ini untuk dibaca oleh teman-teman. Eday dan Lisna memberi saya dorongan untuk lanjut, sebuah dukungan yang berarti buat saya. Tidak lama setelah itu, saya menulis karya kedua yang bernuansa komedi. Prosesnya terasa lebih alami, mungkin karena saya memang senang bercanda. Di saat yang sama, saya juga menggunakan nama Anthony Ventura sebagai penulis. Nama ini tidak berasal dari Ace Ventura seperti yang sering diduga banyak orang, melainkan dari nama seorang pemimpin konser yang sering saya lihat di piringan hitam ayah saya.

Saya menulis banyak cerpen pada periode ini. Beberapa di antaranya tergolong bagus (termasuk Pompeii, walaupun ini sebenarnya cerita romantis), namun tidak sedikit juga yang jelek. Ini pertama kalinya saya menyadari bahwa saya tidak bisa menulis hanya karena diminta oleh orang lain. Entah kenapa ada perasaan yang membatasi kreativitas sehingga hasilnya tidak memuaskan. Setelah beberapa kali menulis berdasarkan pesanan, saya menyadari bahwa hasilnya akan lebih baik jika saya tulis berdasarkan keinginan sendiri. 

Hal lain yang juga saya amati adalah, walau saya bisa mengarang cerita dari awal, saya memiliki kebiasaan mengambil sesuatu yang lucu dari sekeliling saya, kemudian saya kemas dalam gaya saya dan masukkan dalam cerita. Saya sering berpikir bahwa ini mungkin karena rasa humor saya sehingga saya bisa melihat sesuatu yang lucu dari hal-hal yang mungkin terlihat lumrah bagi orang lain.

JKK, parodi Justice League à la Kalbe, dengan jagoan yang konyol dan tidak berguna. 
Image credit: Kent August

Setelah mengasah kemampuan saya selama beberapa tahun, saya pun mulai meninggalkan cerpen dan beralih ke buku (dan saya juga beralih dari tulisan tangan ke komputer, mulai dari aplikasi WordStar). Hasilnya ada berbagai macam, mulai dari kompilasi dari berbagai cerpen yang pernah saya tulis, yakni Sentimental Journey, part 1 dan 2, kumpulan cerpen yang bertema sama, misalnya the Beatlestories, koleksi puisi, koran bulanan, naskah film (ini adalah proyek Andy William, namun akhirnya batal), drama (dan ini ditampilkan di sebuah acara yang diorganisir oleh Kalbe, tempat saya bekerja dulu), sebuah cerita interaktif yang memungkinkan anda untuk memiliki jagoan dan bertualangan dengan cara menentukan pilihan yang membawa anda ke halaman tertentu (JKK: Edisi Petualangan), dua buah buku motivasi yang berdasarkan lirik lagu serta buku-buku novel dan bahkan trilogi yang berjudul the Secret of Sephiroth (namun hanya dua dari tiga buku yang terselesaikan, haha).

Monster-Mania, satu dari banyak cerita fiksi penggemar yang saya tulis. 

1998-2006 adalah periode yang benar-benar produktif! Selain apa yang saya jabarkan di atas, saya juga menulis beberapa lagu bersama teman saya Ardian. Dari sejak SMA, saya bergabung dengan beberapa grup musik dan setidaknya ada satu gitaris yang sangat saya kagumi, namun Ardian adalah pria rendah hati dengan talenta yang jarang digunakan. Saya pun mengajaknya untuk berkolaborasi. 

Friends Forever dalam cuplikan film yang seharusnya menjadi Pheng iu #3.

Pada masa itu, saya juga sempat menerbitkan buku. Di kala menulis biasanya saya tidak berpikir secara komersial. Saya menulis karena saya menikmati prosesnya. Setelah selesai dan saya baca ulang dalam sudut pandang seorang pembaca, barulah saya sadari bahwa hasil tulisan saya seringkali hanya cocok untuk kalangan terbatas. Meskipun demikian, ada juga yang bernuansa komedi dan bisa dinikmati khalayak ramai. 

Crazy Campus yang awalnya berjudul Happy Campus termasuk dalam kategori tersebut. Cerita ini mengetengahkan sepak-terjang empat tokoh utama dan juga teman-teman mereka saat kuliah. Serial ini diinspirasi oleh pengalaman saya selama menjadi asisten laboratorium komputer di kampus. Saya menyelesaikan sekitar 40 cerpen dan, setelah saya pindah ke Jakarta, saya mengirimkan kumpulan cerpen terbaik sebagai sebuah buku ke penerbit. Saya mendapat tanggapan positif dan akhirnya menandatangani kontrak dengan pihak penerbit. Cetakan pertama berjumlah 3000 eksemplar dan demikian juga halnya dengan cetakan kedua. 

Setengah tahun kemudian, buku kedua, Hong Kong Heroes, pun diterbitkan. Buku yang satu ini sempat membuat saya khawatir dengan masalah hak cipta karena kemiripan tokoh yang saya pakai dengan orang-orang terkenal di Hong Kong. Seperti yang saya paparkan sebelumnya, saya biasa menulis karena saya suka. Hong Kong Heroes harusnya hanya merupakan sebuah fiksi penggemar. Cerita ini menampilkan Stephen Chow, Andy Lau, Jackie Chan, Jet Li dan Chow Yun Fat yang memerankan karakter dalam film masing-masing. Oleh karena itu bisa dimengerti kenapa saya sungkan untuk merilis cerita ini, namun pihak penerbit meyakinkan saya bahwa tidak akan ada masalah.

Hong Kong Heroes: 2001 and 2003.
Image credit: Jun Fui (Hong Kong Heroes 2003)

Apakah Crazy Campus dan Hong Kong Heroes terjual laris? Harus saya akui bahwa hasilnya tidak seperti yang saya harapkan. Dari cara cerita ini ditulis, saya tahu bahwa hanya akan dua tipe pembaca, yang benar-benar suka dan yang tidak menyukainya. Bicara soal sukses, Hong Kong Heroes bahkan tidak dicetak ulang dan hanya terjual kurang dari 3000 eksemplar. Karena kurangnya minat pembeli, buku berikutnya (ya, bagi yang belum tahu, sesungguhnya ada dua episode, Hong Kong Heroes 2001 dan 2003) tidak diterbitkan. Bicara soal royalti, jumlahnya cukup lumayan dan berguna untuk biaya hidup saya saat saya pindah dan memulai dari awal di Singapura. 

The Secret of Sephiroth ditulis di penghujung periode ini. Trilogi ini adalah kisah fantasi yang dipengaruhi oleh cerita Harry Potter dan the Lords of the Rings. Pada saat itu, saya juga membaca novel Tarzan yang ditulis oleh Edgar Rice Burroughs. Saya suka cerita Tarzan, tapi saya tidak suka deskripsi pertarungannya yang singkat. Saya merasa bahwa detil pertempuran sangat penting, jadi setiap adegan pertarungan dalam Sephiroth sangat panjang dan ilustratif. Saya akhirnya bertemu dengan editor yang mengerjakan alih bahasa Winnetou. Dia meminta berbagai perubahan dalam cerita (ini alasannya kenapa buku pertama akhirnya ada dua versi), namun kerja sama ini tidak membuahkan hasil. Saya hanya sempat menyelesaikan dua buku yang totalnya berjumlah 800an halaman.

Peta the Secret of Sephiroth.
Image credit: Kent August

Sesudah itu, saya pindah ke Singapura. Selagi saya mencari kerja, saya bermimpi bahwa saya membuat sebuah film. Dari sinilah Pheng iu (yang berarti teman, sebuah frase yang sering digunakan teman saya Sudarpo) bermula. Dengan bantuan teman-teman serumah sebagai bintangnya, saya menulis naskah, menjadi sutradara, menjadi juru kamera dan menyatukan hasilnya menjadi sebuah film. Episode pertama sebenarnya lebih menyerupai eksperimen (saya menyukai adegan tarian yang merupakan adegan luar ruangan yang pertama bagi kita). Film kedua lebih bagus hasilnya. Yang ketiga, yang seharusnya paling bagus karena disutradari oleh Andy William, teman saya yang bergerak di bidang perfilman, putus di tengah jalan karena video kameranya rusak. Walaupun demikian, Pheng iu sebagai tokoh cerita berlanjut dalam bentuk tulisan. Di saat bersamaan, saya kebetulan menemukan situs yang memungkinkan saya untuk menerbitkan buku sendiri. Saya memutuskan untuk mulai menggunakan nama asli saya dan  Pheng iu (Volume 1) karya Anthony Robinson pun muncul di Amazon.com.

Itu adalah karya terakhir saya sebelum saya berhenti menulis selama lima tahun. Ketika putri saya lahir, saya pikir bahwa saya sudah menulis lebih dari 10 tahun lamanya, jadi mungkin sudah saatnya saya berhenti. Saya tidak pernah menulis apa pun sejak itu, sampai awal tahun 2017, ketika saya iseng mengunduh aplikasi Blogger di BlackBerry Priv. 

Senang rasanya bisa kembali! Saya telah melewati masa-masa tulisan tangan, era komputer dan sekarang saya mengandalkan keyboard BlackBerry yang terpercaya sehingga bisa menulis di mana pun! Oh ya, saya punya cerita dan saya senantiasa akan bercerita!

Crazy Campus, Hong Kong Heroes and Pheng iu (Volume 1).

The Hills Have Flowers

(Love Springs Internal)

I took a little road trip to San Diego last weekend. As I drove down the freeway I noticed the hills finally have some color to them thanks to all the rain we had this year.  Enjoying Spring’s floral carpets, got me to thinking about my life and how drastically it’s changed over the past couple of years from an adventurous life to a seemingly dull one.

Nothing brought this fact to light more than a recent phone call I had with an old party friend of mine. He and I had a falling out a year prior. Then the other day I sent him a quick text out of the blue: “I miss you, bro. Hope you can forgive me someday.” To my surprise my phone lit up a few seconds later with his name on the screen.

I picked up, “what’s up Hak Man.” It was like old times as we laughed about stupid things and reminisced on some of the crazier partying we had done. We talked about the boat incident, the time I accidentally broke his couch, the time Hak Man caught fire while driving. And then we got to the subject of what we’ve been up to recently. On the surface: nothing.

In earlier years my life had a lot more color like the hills off the freeway. I was a boiler room rockstar making money at call center chop shops. I eventually ran my own boiler room and of course did a lot of partying. But last year I got a girlfriend and a job at the donut factory, and everything came to a screeching halt. From that point on, I spent the majority of my time with my girl building a relationship with her. And I had to take work seriously, as I could no longer get by with just talent.

Thus I didn’t have any new party stories to share with my friend. Instead, I told him about how much I’ve changed by being in a serious, long-term relationship. I talked about how my girl made me realize that I can be inconsiderate and selfish. I have been on my own for so long that I’d forgotten what it’s like to take another person’s well-being into account.

As for my job at the donut factory, it has been very challenging and it forced me to acquire new skills. No longer was I able to shine simply by making lots of sales using verbal acrobatics. I now had to pay meticulous attention to detail. Dotting i’s and crossing t’s was never my strong point, and for a minute I didn’t think I would survive. But a year and a half later and I’m still here.

My friend went through similar changes. He now works at Boeing putting in 80 + hour weeks. He doesn’t have much time for partying anymore as he is building his career.  So I realized that Springtime and the new year isn’t just a time to make surface changes such as new clothes or shedding a few pounds.

Those changes come and go like flowers on a hill. Internal character changes, the ones no one sees, and true connections with loved ones beyond vapid partying are more valuable. It’s the kind of growth that might not be appreciated but it keeps the trees on the hill through all seasons: the growth of roots.


 - Brick Cruz

Check out my book: Moby Brick's Unshuffled Deck, and my blog: They're All Against Me!

Me and my girl

A Chinese's Point Of View

It’s not easy to be a Chinese living in Indonesian archipelago. I remember my childhood in Pontianak, a small town with strong Hakka and Teochew influences, especially when it was compared with other cities. I'm not sure how it is like these days, but back in the 80s, it was a rough place for a Chinese kid to grow up. I was treated differently, being shouted as Cina as if it was a cardinal sin to be born as a Chinese. In short, to be threatened, mugged or beaten was common then. Some fought back, but like many, I was taught not to get involved further in such a prejudice. Growing up with an experience like this, one couldn't help learning that Chinese was a minority and disliked for no apparent reason. This in turn shaped our characters to be humble and, at the same time, always on a constant watch.

As I grew older, I got more exposure that allowed me to understand the concept of unity in diversity that was preached by our Founding Fathers. When I graduated from college, I moved to Jakarta. It was totally a different environment where the Chinese actually had to blend in, unlike in Pontianak where we usually stayed within our own community. I was surprised that the non-Chinese colleagues down there were actually fine people. They were quite open and friendly towards me. It was a rather strange feeling, but in a good way.

Then came President Gus Dur. Under his administration, the lunar new year became a public holiday. I saw how people from all walks of life in Pontianak celebrated it. All joined in for the night of fireworks and dragon dance. It was impressive, not to mention touching, to see how, for once, everyone took off their attributes and enjoyed the fun together.

11 years ago, I migrated to Singapore. Working in the Lion City meant we were required to work with anybody, regardless what their skin colors were. What count was what this person could do and contribute to the team. This unique experience, together with the chances to travel to other parts of the world, brought the idea of racial harmony to a whole new level. It was beautiful when people respected and accepted others as who they were. We were richer because of the diversity and life was more interesting due to it.

When I look back, I don't hold grudges for being treated unfairly. I'm, in fact, thankful that I was born in Indonesia, a country so beautiful that was founded based on Bhinneka Tunggal Ika (unity in diversity). I proudly told my Singaporean friends that Indonesia consisted of many ethnicities such as Batak, Sudanese, Javanese and many more, so the reality was nothing like their original perception, that non-Chinese in Indonesia must be the Malay. I smiled when I read the remark made by Lee Kuan Yew in one of his books, One Man's View of the World, that the most important legacy from President Soekarno was Bahasa Indonesia. Thanks to the national language, all Indonesians from the East to the West can communicate with each other. I'm also happy that unlike Malaysia, our country has done away the bumiputera concept. That means as long as we're born in Indonesia, we're all equal.

Then came the Jakarta election and, as far as I could remember, it was the dirtiest, the ugliest and the most distasteful election ever. Everything that could be used to sow discord, be it hardcore religious view, racism or whatever, was used as a propaganda. What a shame, really. What bothered me here was the fact that the racism card was suddenly on the table again. Just because we were Chinese, did this make us less Indonesian than the rest? While I couldn't speak on behalf of others, but as a Chinese who was born in Indonesia, I never thought of myself as being part of China. Not even once. I'm a proud Indonesian, or else I would have converted to other nationality a long time ago.

Look, if there's any jealousy just because of the idea that the Chinese minority is controlling the economy, have you ever seen a very poor Chinese that only can afford house flooring that is made of soil? Furthermore, the Chinese was suppressed in many aspects for years, leaving them nothing else to do except trading, hence could you blame them if they'd become very good at it?

Now, I'm not saying that the Chinese is always on the right side. We Chinese have our fair share of mistakes, too. To be frank, what happens today was a legacy from both sides and not a very proud one at that, but the choice to make it right is ours. Let's not forget the fact that all of us, as Indonesians, care about our country and would like to see it prosper.

What should we do, then? Let's acknowledge that Indonesia is a big country, but majority is uneducated. The problem with the less educated people, coupled with the possible fact that they are also poor, is how easy they are to be stirred up for personal gains. It is undeniable that education is a must these days. For the fact that even educated people could be petty and fanatic for the wrong reasons, what chances do the poor have, if they are not educated?

Next, religions are alright, but the relationship between human and God is personal and it shouldn't be politicized, especially in Indonesia, a country that is so plural, where there are five religions protected by the law. Long before today, our Founding Fathers had realized this. Why one earth some are trying to deny the truth today?

Lastly, a leader is to lead and to serve at the same time. Never before in the history of Indonesia that we have an honest president like Jokowi, who wants to work hard and has proven himself, one result after another. Shouldn't we all support him? Same goes for those who work under his administration. If the civil servants are still lazy and corrupt, they should be ashamed of themselves. How do they sleep at night? That's not our problem, anyway, but we'll make it our problem and our fight to support President Jokowi. This we do by choosing the gubernatorial candidates that are in line with our president. While the fate of this country is for God to decide, but the choice is definitely ours to make...

Image credit: temanahok.com

Sudut Pandang Seorang Tionghoa

Tidak gampang menjadi seorang Tionghoa di bumi Nusantara. Saya ingat masa kecil saya di Pontianak, di mana Tionghoa di kota kelahiran saya ini memiliki budaya yang lebih kental dibanding daerah lain di Indonesia dan masih berbicara dalam bahasa dialek di rumah. Saya tidak tahu bagaimana kondisinya sekarang, tapi Pontianak di dekade 80an bukanlah tempat yang kondusif bagi seorang anak untuk tumbuh dan berkembang. Saya diperlakukan berbeda, diteriaki dengan sebutan Cina seakan-akan itu sesuatu yang salah, diancam akan dipukuli dan bahkan uang jajan saya pun pernah dirampas beberapa kali.

Tumbuh di daerah seperti ini mengajarkan secara tidak langsung bahwa saya ini minoritas yang tidak disukai tanpa alasan yang jelas dan oleh karenanya saya harus senantiasa rendah hati dan waspada. Ketika saya lulus kuliah dan pindah ke Jakarta, terus-terang saya merasa terkejut karena teman-teman kerja saya yang bukan orang Tionghoa ternyata ramah, bersikap menerima dan sangat bersahabat.

Ketika Presiden Gus Dur menjadikan tahun baru Cina sebagai hari libur nasional, saya melihat betapa semua penduduk Pontianak dari berbagai kalangan turut merayakannya mulai dari permainan kembang api semalam suntuk sampai tarian naga. Ada rasa sejuk di hati saat melihat semua suku, ras dan agama menanggalkan atributnya untuk bersuka-cita menikmati perayaan budaya ini.

11 tahun yang lalu, saya pindah ke Singapura. Bekerja di Singapura berarti kita dituntut untuk bekerja sama dengan siapa saja, tidak peduli apa warna kulitnya dan yang dipentingkan adalah apa yang bisa dilakukan oleh masing-masing anggota tim demi tercapainya tujuan akhir dari sebuah proyek. Pengalaman di sini, ditambah lagi dengan kesempatan untuk berkelana ke negara-negara, membuka wawasan saya tentang keharmonisan bersuku, berbangsa dan bernegara.

Kemudian, ketika saya melihat kembali, saya tidak mendendam, tetapi bersyukur telah dilahirkan sebagai orang Indonesia yang berasaskan Bhinneka Tunggal Ika. Saya dengan bangga bercerita kepada teman-teman Singapura, bahwa Indonesia itu terdiri dari banyak suku, bukan saja suku Melayu seperti yang selalu mereka pikirkan. Saya tersenyum ketika membaca tulisan Lee Kuan Yew yang menyebutkan bahwa salah satu peninggalan Bung Karno yang paling penting adalah Bahasa Indonesia, sebab ini memungkinkan kita semua, dari Sabang sampai Merauke, untuk berkomunikasi satu sama lain. Saya senang Indonesia berbeda dengan Malaysia karena dari segi hukum, kita tidak lagi menganut konsep bumiputera (atau pribumi/non-pribumi dalam konteks Indonesia). Ini berarti kita semua adalah sama dan sejajar.

Lalu tiba-tiba kita dihadapkan dengan kenyataan yang terjadi di Pilkada DKI saat ini. Betapa menyedihkan dan konyol. Saya tidak bisa berbicara mewakili semua pihak, tapi sebagai seorang Tionghoa yang lahir di Indonesia, saya tidak berpikir bahwa saya ini bangsa Cina. Tidak sekali pun. Justru sebaliknya, saya bangga menjadi orang Indonesia, sebab kalau tidak, kenapa saya tidak pindah kewarganegaraan menjadi orang Singapura dalam 11 tahun terakhir ini?

Jika ada iri hati karena orang Tionghoa dianggap menguasai perekonomian Indonesia, apakah anda pernah melihat orang Tionghoa yang hanya memiliki rumah beralaskan tanah karena begitu miskinnya? Lagipula berpuluh-puluh tahun suku Tionghoa dibatasi dalam berbagai aspek, jadi apalagi yang musti dilakukan kalau bukan berdagang?

Saya tidak mengatakan bahwa suku Tionghoa sepenuhnya benar. Kondisi hari ini adalah sebuah kesalahan yang dibiarkan berlarut-larut oleh dua belah pihak, namun kita punya pilihan untuk mengoreksinya. Kenyataannya adalah kita semua peduli dan ingin melihat Indonesia menjadi lebih baik.

Jadi apa yang harus kita lakukan? Indonesia adalah bangsa yang besar, tapi sebagian besar belum terdidik. Masalah terbesar dari orang bodoh adalah gampang dihasut. Di sini tidak bisa dipungkiri bahwa pendidikan itu penting dan memungkinkan orang melihat lebih dari sekedar SARA.

Selanjutnya, jika kita mau belajar dari negara-negara maju, agama adalah urusan pribadi seseorang dengan Tuhan, tidak bisa dicampuradukkan dengan kehidupan berbangsa dan bernegara, apalagi di Indonesia yang begitu majemuk penduduknya. Ini sudah dari jauh-jauh hari dipahami dan disepakati oleh bapak-bapak bangsa, kenapa kita mau mengingkarinya hari ini?

Yang terakhir, pemimpin itu hendaknya bersifat mengayomi dan melayani. Untuk pertama kalinya kita memiliki seseorang seperti presiden Jokowi yang jujur, mau bekerja begitu keras dan terlihat hasilnya. Tidakkah sewajarnya kita dukung dia? Demikian juga jajaran pemerintahan yang ada di bawahnya. Kalau pola pikirnya masih malas dan korupsi, sepantasnya mereka malu. Puluhan tahun kita tertinggal dari bangsa-bangsa lain, jadi sungguh tidak terbayangkan orang macam apa yang bisa tidur nyenyak ketika hati nurani semestinya merasa tidak tenang. Akan tetapi itu urusan mereka. Yang menjadi urusan kita adalah melakukan apa yang kita bisa untuk mendukung presiden Jokowi, salah satunya adalah dengan memilih pejabat yang searah dengan pemerintah pusat...

Harmoni antar ras: liburan bersama Pak Doel di Gunung Bromo, tahun 2004.

The Bizarre Adventure Of Atom-Boy And Uncle-Man (Part 5)

And the mysterious man turned out to be no mystery at all once he was caught. He was Suleiman Usman Kurdi, a Kurdish known as S.U. Kurdi to his friends, more popular and recognized by superheroes as Bomber-Man, specialized in suicide bombing. He wasn’t a bad man, but he had been bullied for being different since he was a kid. For a start, he was an albino, but his childhood bully called him a leper. This was inappropriate, but to kids, it was much more fun to call him a leper and see him cry, so they didn’t bother to call him an albino, let alone show him sympathy. This left a deep scar in his vulnerable feeling, making him fragile and anti-social.

So he sat there in the corner with no friends…

And the insult went on as he grew up. S.U. Kurdi always had a hint of feminism in everything he did, from the way he walked to the way he curled his eyelashes, and it hurt him bad when people mimicked this weakness in front of him. Once he was reduced to tears when his male colleague intentionally walked with his butt shaking like duck ass whilst others burst into laughter.

So he sat there in his cubicle with no friends… 

As if that was not enough, his Alzheimer’s stricken Grandma came up with a gossip about his eyes. S.U. Kurdi’s eyes were so small they looked like those Chinese eyes so on her deathbed, the dying Grandma concocted a story that her daughter-in-law was left by his son and she was so poor that she got no choice but to trade free sex with a bowl of wonton noodle. Nine months after that accursed bowl of wonton noodle was eaten, S.U. Kurdi was born. When S.U. Kurdi disagreed and tried to argue, his Grandma argued back that she never said such a cruel thing about her beloved daughter-in-law. Thanks to her Alzheimer’s, it seemed like she forgot what she just said and she died in peace while her one and only grandson got to live an awful life with plenty of people who secretly stared at him and whispered to each other about his Chinese heritage.

So he sat alone at his grandma’s funeral with no friends…

There was always a certain limit of humiliation that a man could bear and it was this complete set of embarrassment that finally drove S.U. Kurdi mad, so he swore to kill all people that bullied him. But he was unlucky that on his debut as a super villain, he was confronted by Kung Fu. Calm as always, Kung Fu wasn’t scared even though Bomber-Man ripped off his clothes to reveal the bands of dynamites strapped all over his body. Facing the frantic Bomber-Man, Kung Fu just needed to point out one simple fact to him. And he said, “do you realize that when you do suicide bombing, you are the first to die?”

The blatant truth awoke Bomber-Man. He didn’t want to die. He wanted to live, but people never gave him chance. Then the ever-charming Kung Fu told him that was not true. If he wanted to live, he might go to Kung Pao Chicken and Assorted Szechuan Cuisine restaurant and look for Vendy Fendi Lee. This man was an old friend of Kung Fu and he would help him.

Before he left, Kung Fu also said that if Bomber-Man didn’t like his Chinese eyes, he could do something like wearing sunglasses –another simple fact that Bomber-Man never thought of.

“What about LASIK?” asked Bomber-Man, tried to say something smart to in order to cover his stupidity.

“No, that won’t help,” answered Kung Fu bluntly.

And never again Bomber-Man made an effort to outsmart Kung Fu. He knew the man in front of him was a wiser person. Not only that, he was trying to save him by giving him a second chance. So Bomber-Man followed his advice and sought Vendy Fendi Lee for help. The owner of Kung Pao Chicken and Assorted Szechuan Cuisine restaurant welcomed him with open arms, listened to his problem and gave him job. Before long, S.U. Kurdi regained his confidence and with the support of his mentor-like friend, he opened Kurdi’s Kebab and Assorted Kurdish Cuisine restaurant. It did well, so there came the time for him to depart. 

But their friendship continued. From time to time they would have a drinking session and there they would reminisce the past. The last time they had it was last night and today, without a warning, the first thing in the morning that S.U. Kurdi read was the sad news about the death of his best friend…

***

That explained why S.U. Kurdi was peeping through the window today. He wasn’t coming to secretly peek at the uncircumcised stuff –though a shemale personality inside him didn’t mind to see one– he only wanted to make sure whether the news was true or not. However, Atom-Boy still felt suspicious about the fact that S.U. Kurdi ran away the moment he chased him. But S.U. Kurdi has a solid reason for this: he was once a super villain, therefore he would instinctively flee when a superhero ran towards him.

A perfect alibi S.U. Kurdi may have given, but the same excuse has made him the last person Vendy Fendi Lee met before he died. Atom-Boy, who still found it very hard to believe that such a highly regarded hero like Kung Fu would pee himself to death, couldn’t help thinking that this was a lead to another possibility. What if S.U. Kurdi poisoned the victim, undressed him and hid his underwear, peed on him so he got the ammonia smell, put the fake diary to fake the murder, escaped and then returned to the crime scene to pretend as an innocent bystander? The truth was, before he became a respectable man, S.U. Kurdi was mentally disturbed. Who was to say that he was cured? He swore to kill all people when he donned the Bomber-Man costume, so there was always a chance this was a deranged tale of murder where he turned out to be an ungrateful bastard and killed the very person who saved his life and trusted him the most. Didn’t he just admit it himself that he was once a super villain and he would still act like one no matter he tried to behave? So why couldn’t S.U. Kurdi be the suspect? It’s possible!

But for what reason did he kill Vendy Fendi Lee? The guy with mental problem might need no reason to kill, but still, for a victim who laid lifeless with his buttocks bared open, it was very clumsy of Atom-Boy for not asking the coroner to perform an ass autopsy. Now, come to think of it, it might be the case of sodomy. 

Shaking his head with regret, Atom-Boy tried to redeem himself by interrogating the suspect:

Atom-Boy: “So what happened last night?”

S.U. Kurdi: “We drank.”

Atom-Boy: “Then?”

S.U. Kurdi: “We drank again.”

Atom-Boy: “After that?”

S.U. Kurdi: “We opened another bottle.”

And this poor quality conversation could go on forever. Feeling frustrated, Atom-Boy almost thoughtlessly accused S.U. Kurdi as the murderer, but when he searched him, he noticed that the ex-super villain carried a book called A Big Book of the Superheroes’ Secret Origins. The author’s name was pseudonymous, referred to only as Bookmark. Sounded familiar, though.

What book was that? Why did he carry the book at the particular moment like this? When Atom-Boy demanded an explanation, all S.U. Kurdi could tell was somebody had put this book into his doorstep this morning. The title was so interesting it made S.U. Kurdi read it to kill time and distracted his mind when he was on his way to Vendy Fendi Lee’s house. It was from this book S.U. Kurdi knew that Kung Fu and Vendy Fendi Lee was the same person! All the more reason for him to rush there and proved what the book said! Thus he carried it all along. 

Atom-Boy browsed the book and he immediately sweat. All the details were there! Who on earth was the writer again? Bookmark? Why, the familiarity lingered on. But of course! What if, instead of Bookmark, the name was Trademark? That was more like it! He was defeated by Kung Fu, so it only made sense that he wanted him dead. He then killed him and put the blame on this poor guy. Why not?

Surprised by his current larger than life analysis, which was a much better one compared to Uncle-Man’s gibberish and his own earlier rubbish that sounded more like an analysis about an analysis by a certain analyst with a presumably good analytical skill, Atom-Boy thought he would need the book of secret origins in order to continue his investigation. After all, he couldn’t let the book fall into the wrong hand. It would endanger the superheroes community. 

Either he was sincere to help or –if he was guilty– trying to cover his crime by using the book as false evidence, S.U. Kurdi passed it to Atom-Boy without hesitation, although he did ask whether he could write his name as the owner of the book or not –a request that, much to his chagrin, was firmly rejected by Atom-Boy. Then, though Atom-Boy would like to bring S.U. Kurdi to nearest police station, his gut told him that this man was not guilty. Therefore, Atom-Boy paid the cab and asked S.U. Kurdi to go there himself. Afterward Atom-Boy quickly followed the clue that he had deduced just now…

***

Mark, who was no longer Trademark, was forever a patient in the sanatorium. There was good reason why: Kung Fu’s mighty kicks did him a permanent damage, crushing his bones into ashes. Doctors, paramedics, surgeons and even acupunctures had tried very hard to re-calcify his bones, but it was a slow and painful process. It might take him his whole lifetime to recover, hence he was stuck there as an eternal patient.

When Mark knew why Atom-Boy looked for him, he couldn’t stop laughing. So the man who beat him mercilessly had died. Served him right! When Atom-Boy accused him for devising such an evil plan to kill his captor, Mark said he felt honored but frankly speaking, he thought he was not that smart. When Atom-Boy said the book on his hand is the proof, Mark showed him the fact that he couldn’t even find his own hand, let alone to write a book.

As much as Atom-Boy wanted to object, Mark’s words rang true, though. In the poor state he was in right now, he looked more like a bowl of Chinese congee than a human being. His skeletal system was totally gone, so he basically was just a pile of flesh with no bones. His ass could easily be mistaken as his cheek while his cheek could be either side of the buttocks. And as if that was not scary enough, one could see tongue in cheek there. Literally!

Atom-Boy was now out of idea, but still he didn’t trust the archenemy of Kung Fu. Feeling distressed, he failed to see that he might have made a wrong move, so the more he tried, the more mistakes he might make. In his desperate effort to force Mark to confess, he ignored what he had tried to acknowledge before. He dismissed the thought that S.U. Kurdi might be innocent. Instead, he questioned the chance that Mark might pay a ghost writer to write this book and, because he knew their secret identity, he then hired S.U. Kurdi, whose mental state perhaps was still unstable, to kill Vendy Fendi Lee and…

Before Atom-Boy finished his highly unlikely hypothesis, Mark had retorted back, told him in the face he was a bloody fool to think that a once unsuccessful-rapper-cum-unsuccessful-rapist happened to be rich. Mark was definitely penniless. When the anxious Atom-Boy replied that there should be a reason why he was still alive, Mark mumbled that while it was amazing that he lived after what he had gone through, miracle was exactly not the reason why. He was not dead simply because the sanatorium kept him as a bone calcification experiment object #44. That was how pitiful he was.

The last sentence left Atom-Boy wordless. He was shaking because whatever things he believed until a while ago seem like crumbling down now. It was at this moment the cynical Mark accidentally blurted out a valuable suggestion. He said, “if only you could think of somebody who really hated Kung Fu for, I don’t know, fail to save him, probably, so he would go through all the trouble just to get Kung Fu killed and blame the murder on somebody else like me.”

And suddenly everything seemed clear to Atom-Boy: Kung Fu didn’t die because of his own pee. Somebody who killed him wanted Atom-Boy, or whoever who happened to be there, to think that the hero died a humiliating death. That was why the victim died with no underpants. The diary was a fake one, of course, it was made to give an impression that the hero had kept the dark secret for so long.

After that, entered S.U. Kurdi. Because of A Big Book of the Superheroes’ Secret Origins, he was confused by the fact that Kung Fu and Vendy Fendi Lee was indeed the same person. He fitted the scene as a wrong person at the wrong time and the wrong place. The only role of his presence was, thanks to the book that he carried along, he would be the misleading clue that eventually would lead Atom-Boy to Mark. Risky though it might seem, but if this plan didn’t work out, S.U. Kurdi was still a failsafe for the murderer. He was the last person to see Vendy Fendi Lee alive. He was an ex-super villain. He had a mental problem in the past. It was really more than easy to accuse him for the crime that he never did.

And finally, Mark was the victim of the crime. He was the biggest bastard of all before Kung Fu defeated him. He was supposed to be the one who hated Kung Fu the most. It only made sense if he plotted all this to see his nemesis died. After all, why would he, a super villain, deny the dubious fact that he had killed his sworn enemy? It was a proud thing for a criminal. It would reestablish his tarnished reputation. He wouldn’t deny it, not if nothing went wrong. 

But something did go wrong. For such a perfect crime, it had with the single biggest flaw ever: A Big Book of the Superheroes’ Secret Origins, written by Bookmark. 

Except Mark, the alleged Bookmark, never wrote the book. He wouldn’t be able to, even if he wanted to. He didn’t have the knowledge of superheroes’ secret identities. If that was the case, who hated Kung Fu for his failed attempt to save him, knew the secret of superheroes and wanted to blame all this on Mark, formerly known as Trademark?

The suspect was the unsuspected one. Now, come to think of it, it was no coincidence that he found the diary when nobody seemed to be able to find it, because big chance he had brought the diary all along! This confirmed that the only person who could do all this was him…

The End

***

“Well done!” said Wah Wah when she congratulated Willem. 

“Well done!” repeated Mark, but he was actually referring to the steak he ate just now.

And aside from Mark’s, other reviews were pretty much the same as Wah Wah’s, except this one: 

“What? It ends like this? Now that’s confusing,” said Enrico. “I didn’t get it when I read the script and I still don’t get it after I watched the movie. Who’s the killer, anyway?”

***

The front and back cover of Pheng iu (Volume 1)
Image credit: Zhou Xiong Zhen

A Tale Of Two Businesses

The following story is about the marriage of two talents that brings this beautiful couple to a level that one would have not achieved without the other. It began with this friend of mine called Harry, the son of a baker and a shoes/sandals distributor. Tall and handsome, Harry could have been a model if opportunity knocked, but no, as he lived in a small town called Pontianak, he ended up doing stuff related to computers instead. It wasn't meant to be a long stint for him, apparently, so our man soon found himself dabbling in his father's business but, alas, neither shoes nor sandals business proven to be the right fit for him.

That was when he moved on to vent out his creativity on cake icing and stuff. Before long, Harry became an expert in baking all sorts of cakes. His Indonesian layer cake, locally known as kue lapis, was gaining fame then (and it's very much his signature today). He loved his work, pretty much settled in and was eventually ready to take over Julia's Cake, the business that was named after his mother.

Yet life had more surprises in store for Harry. After marrying a girl who used to be a freelance make-up artist, the newlyweds realized that something else could be done here. The husband, Harry, was no stranger to wedding cakes and he could do some photography, too, an interest that he picked up along the way. The wife, Merry, with what she could do and her experience, definitely could lend a hand.

And the rest was history. Together, they opened another business, a bridal called D'Angel. They set up a shop for their business and hired the employees, two for taking care of the shop and another two for cake production. In the time of need, freelance would be hired as helping hands, too. The shop also came with an indoor studio where photo shoot would take place.

Bridal, as explained by Harry to me, is a complex business with many items in one package. He will have to factor in the wedding cake, the photo sessions, wedding dress, make-up and so forth, then have all these packaged nicely in attractive prices, therefore balancing the right pricing and the quality of the outcome could be tricky. For Harry, however, he knows the line he shouldn't cross. He definitely doesn't want to price it so low that the quality of his work suffers or maintains the quality while suffering financial losses. He takes another approach instead: he ensures that he can still make profits while justifying the reasonable price with a qualified result. He neither over-promises nor oversells it. He convinces the customers that quality comes with the price and by doing so, he also manages to keep his reputation intact. The same principle is applied on Julia's Cake, too, hence it is worth paying the price for the ingredients used and the excellent taste of the cakes.

We discussed further about bridal as it was a pretty broad topic. Harry told me that his starting price is IDR 2,000,000, which is roughly around SGD 210. The wedding package can be customized according to the need, for example, wedding dresses rental is available and they'll make sure that it fits, but should there be a request for tailor-made, that can also be done. The deal usually begins with a deposit from a customer and then followed by a list of schedules such as gown fitting, photo sessions and others that need to be completed before the wedding day.

Photo sessions normally consist of two parts, indoor and outdoor. Indoor is easier to be done, but outdoor can be challenging. The weather, be it rain or shine, can be quite punishing in Pontianak and surroundings. The photographer team has to be quick in improvising and anticipating the changing of weather. They also have to be in a fit condition for a smooth photo taking session, especially when they are traveling a long and arduous journey for scenic spots.

Apart from word of mouth where he has no control whatsoever, Harry promotes his businesses via Instagram and, to a lesser extent, Facebook. Social medias are not only free, but also very powerful in conveying the message. With Instagram, he can easily reach his potential customers and show them the latest collection that he has on, let's say, wedding dresses or the result of the make-up such as the before and after images of the bride.

Given the fact that weddings are seasonal, especially for Chinese couples who are still particular about certain lunar calendar dates, I was wondering how the business was like when it was an off-peak season. Apparently the business can flow quite naturally with such a yearly cycle. I was told that while it's true weddings normally take place on certain months, but the pre-wedding activities like gown fitting and photo shoots, happen outside the busy period, so they still have things to do. Apart from that, Harry and Merry are flexible enough to pick up other jobs such as family photo sessions, make-up class, etc. At the same time, it's still business as usual for Julia's Cake.

Hoping that he would take the bait, I also asked if he had ever encountered difficult customers that didn't want to pay or pregnant bride-to-be, but Harry just smiled and asked whether he really had to answer this question. I would have had a field day if he shared it with me, but apparently your secrets are safe with him, you lucky customers! Not only Harry is good in what he's doing, but he's also a man of integrity. This is a guy you should be doing your business with!

Historical moment @ D'Angel Bridal: a Singaporean presented MRT card to the proud owner

Harry, Merry Dan Kisah Dua Bisnis

Kisah berikut ini bercerita tentang bersatunya dua talenta yang membawa pasangan ini ke jenjang yang takkan tercapai tanpa kehadiran satu sama lain. Semua ini bermula dari Harry, anak seorang pembuat kue dan distributor sepatu/sandal. Tinggi, gagah dan tampan, Harry bisa menjadi seorang model bila mendapatkan kesempatan, tetapi nasib berkata lain. Di kota kecil Pontianak, ia justru berkutat dengan bidang komputer setelah menyelesaikan pendidikannya. Usahanya dalam mencari jati diri berlanjut dengan uji coba dalam menekuni usaha ayahnya, tapi itu pun dirasakan tidak cocok. Dari situ Harry berpindah lagi, kali ini dia berkreasi dalam memanggang dan merias kue. Upaya kali ini tepat sasaran dan jerih-payahnya terbayarkan. Seiring dengan berjalannya waktu, keahliannya berkembang pesat dan hari ini, kue lapisnya senantiasa dicari. Harry pun lambat-laun melanjutkan Julia's Cake yang telah dirintis oleh ibunya.

Kendati begitu, takdirnya tidak berhenti sampai di situ. Setelah menikah dengan Merry yang pernah berprofesi sebagai ahli rias wajah, pasangan muda ini menyadari bahwa ada sesuatu yang bisa mereka kerjakan bersama. Sang suami, Harry, tidaklah asing dengan kue pengantin. Ia juga berminat menjajal bidang fotografi yang selama ini sudah dijajakinya secara amatir. Sang istri, Merry, dengan bakat dan pengalamannya, tentu bisa melengkapi.

Harry dan Merry lantas memutuskan bahwa usaha bridal adalah sesuatu yang sanggup mereka kerjakan bersama dan layak dicoba. Setelah itu, dibukalah D'Angel Bridal yang dikombinasikan dengan Julia's Cake. Mereka menyewa toko, merancang studio untuk kebutuhan foto indoor dan mempekerjakan karyawan, dua untuk toko di depan dan dua lagi di bagian produksi kue. Bilamana dibutuhkan, terkadang mereka juga menyewa karyawan lepas untuk aktivitas foto.

Mengutip apa yang dijelaskan oleh Harry, bridal merupakan sebuah bisnis yang kompleks. Berbagai macam komponen, mulai dari wedding cake, gaun pernikahan, sesi foto pranikah, dan lain-lain, dikemas dalam paket yang atraktif harganya untuk ditawarkan kepada para calon pelanggan. Menentukan harga paket tidaklah mudah. Terlalu tinggi, calon pelanggan bisa berpindah ke tempat lain. Terlalu rendah, bisnis bisa rugi atau kualitas pekerjaan menjadi tidak maksimal. Oleh karena itu, penting bagi Harry untuk tetap mendapatkan untung dan pada saat yang sama, dia harus meyakinkan calon pelanggan bahwa untuk sebuah kualitas, tentunya dibutuhkan harga. Kalau terlalu murah dan kualitasnya tidak maksimal, Harry berpendapat bahwa lebih baik dia menolak bisnis tersebut. Ini penting, karena reputasi perlu dijaga. Konsep yang sama juga diterapkan di Julia's Cake, dimana dia hanya memakai bahan terbaik sehingga rasa tetap terjaga.

Dari segi harga, paket yang ditawarkan Harry mulai dari kisaran dua juta rupiah. Paket pernikahan ini bisa diatur sesuai dengan kemauan calon pelanggan, misalnya saja calon pelanggan bisa memilih untuk menyewa atau menjahit gaun pengantin. Harga menyewa dan menjahit tentunya berbeda dan bisa mempengaruhi harga paket. Bilamana sudah terjadi kesepakatan, makanya calon pengantin harus membayar uang muka, baru setelah itu jadwal aktivitas pranikah sampai hari-H, mulai dari uji coba gaun, foto sesi dan sebagainya disusun.

Foto pranikah terbagi menjadi dua sesi, yakni indoor dan outdoor. Foto dalam ruangan lebih mudah untuk dikerjakan, baik oleh pemotret maupun yang dipotret. Outdoor lebih banyak tantangannya, terlebih lagi karena cuaca di Pontianak dan sekitarnya seringkali tidak menentu. Stamina yang kuat juga dibutuhkan buat sesi foto yang mengambil lokasi jauh dari kota, dimana rombongan foto musti menempuh jarak yang cukup jauh untuk mencapai tempat tujuan.

Bicara soal iklan, selain promosi dari relasi dan dari mulut ke mulut, Harry banyak mengandalkan Instagram dan Facebook. Media sosial bukan hanya gratis, tetapi juga memiliki daya jangkau yang luar biasa dan praktis untuk menyampaikan pesan ke khalayak ramai. Sebagai contoh, dengan Instagram, Harry bisa memperlihatkan koleksi gaun-gaun terbarunya dalam sekali unggah. Dia juga bisa dengan mudah menampilkan perbandingan hasil sebelum dan sesudah rias wajah yang tentunya bisa menjadi bahan pertimbangan bagi calon pelanggan.

Bisnis pernikahan adalah musiman dalam arti hanya bulan-bulan tertentu yang ramai, terutama jika pelanggan adalah pasangan Tionghoa yang masih merujuk ke penanggalan Cina. Oleh karena itu menarik untuk diketahui, apa sebenarnya yang dilakukan oleh pengusaha bridal ketika memasuki bulan-bulan yang biasanya tidak dipadati oleh pernikahan. Harry menjelaskan bahwa sesungguhnya bisnis ini bersifat jangka panjang, dalam arti jauh sebelum hari penikahan, para pelanggan sudah membeli paketnya. Dari hari pertama pelanggan membayar uang muka sampai hari penikahan itu sendiri, ada banyak hal yang bisa dikerjakan, misalnya seperti sesi foto dan lain-lain, jadi sebenarnya dari segi aktivitas, ia tidak pernah benar-benar vakum. Kalau memang ada waktu kosong, itu biasanya diisi dengan kegiatan lain, misalnya bisnis foto keluarga atau kelas rias wajah. Di samping itu, Harry juga memiliki kesibukan rutin di Julia's Cake.

Sebagai penutup, penulis juga bertanya apakah selama ini Harry pernah berurusan dengan pelanggan yang rewel atau yang hamil sebelum menikah. Mendapat pertanyaan seperti ini, Harry justru bertanya balik, apa perlu pertanyaan ini dijawab? Jadi apa boleh buat, tidak ada cerita seru atau gosip, namun di satu sisi, ini berarti rahasia pelanggan aman di tangannya. Harry bukan saja piawai dalam apa yang ia kerjakan, tetapi juga berintegritas tinggi. Dengan orang seperti inilah seharusnya anda berbisnis, Pembaca!

Rias wajah oleh Merry
Image credit: D'Angel Bridal

PS: Bulan Juni lalu penulis dan teman-teman berlibur dari Jakarta sampai Karawang dengan ditemani oleh kue lapis Julia's Cake. Setelah lama mendengar tentang kue lapis ini, akhirnya penulis berkesempatan untuk mencicipinya. Rasanya tidak terlalu basah, tidak terlalu manis dan memang enak dimakan.

Kue lapis Julia's Cake
Image credit: Pontianak Food Critics & Reviews (Kritik & Ulasan Makanan Pontianak)

The Bizarre Adventure Of Atom-Boy And Uncle-Man (Part 4)

It was one lustful and love-consuming wedding night. She unbuttoned me, so I undressed her. She kissed me here, so I touched her there. She spat on my thing, so I sneezed on her stuff. Gross and unhygienic it might seem it made people fail to see how intense it was. So intimate it was the intimacy was intimidating. With a lot of ooh and aah, love couldn’t go wrong.

Or so I thought, before she grabbed my ass.

There was always something there, something as visible as Braille that one could read it simply by feeling it. And I cringed the moment her fingers slithered wildly, clearly following the embossed curves curiously. After that, she stopped and became expressionless. She was busy love-biting me before, so there she was, on the top of my plain and hairless chest, with her eyes stared blankly and lower jaw dropped whilst her tongue stuck motionless on my right nipple. When I opened my eyes, suddenly I didn’t find her attractive anymore. Ugly was more like it.

Just like a man who found it hard to accept that his wife wasn’t a virgin anymore, I could tell from her face that it was extremely difficult for her to digest the fact that her husband’s ass had been deflowered, worse still, by a man. So that was it. With the cryptic words, “too sexy for me to handle,” she excused herself to restroom, escaped from the window and had never been seen since then.

My marriage life ended on my very wedding night. It wasn’t till death do us part. It was… till ass do us part. And I cried myself to sleep. I woke up with one thing in my mind: revenge!

***

Tom Lee Jones was drooling like a retard inside the MRT when the TV program was suddenly interrupted by breaking news. A newsreader was reporting the miserable and humiliating death of Vendy Fendi Lee, the owner of the famous Kung Pao Chicken and Assorted Szechuan Cuisine restaurant. He was found dead with his groin exposed, so the broadcasting people –learning from experience, this time– had to censor his crotch before they started broadcasting live from his deathbed. But the field reporter, a man with a keen reporting instinct who always kept in mind that public has a right to know, did a good job nonetheless. He managed to describe the brutal details such as it had not been circumcised.

The news did have an impact of a rude awakening call on Tom Lee Jones. No, he didn’t care that it wasn’t circumcised. That hardly bothered him. What mattered was he knew the fact that Vendy Fendi Lee was no ordinary man. Not only he was the best Kung Pao Chicken chef ever, he was also the alter ego of Kung Fu! 

Kung Fu was like the greatest superhero ever and now he was dead! So serious this incident was it drove Tom to start thinking again, effective immediately. With saliva still dripping from his mouth and frowning blurry eyes while he was subconsciously lost in thought, he looked scarier than ever, menacing enough to force the passenger next to him to dial the mental hospital and beg for help. 

At the current state, although Tom looked like a thinking imbecile, he actually thought clearly now. Within seconds, he can tell it was very much impossible that a reputable hero died a bottom-half-naked death like this. On the top of that, according to the reporter, nothing was stolen. This convincesdTom that it ought to be a murder case, and big chance that the murderer knew his secret identity!

Suddenly the enthusiasm was too much for Tom to bear. He was fainting, indirectly regaining his blackout sense. Then the thunder roared and Tom transformed. While that was happening, the MRT abruptly shook and was out of control. Just when the train was about to crash and everybody was whispering every prayer in every God’s name in every language –from the ancient Tetragrammaton spelling YHWH to the modern day yelling in English such as Christ!– a somewhat familiar man in one piece skin-tight garment appeared out of nowhere to save the day. At a glance, he did look like a young man with fetishism problem, but the witnesses soon realized that the mysterious character in spandex was Atom-Boy, the long lost superhero! He was back on the track, literally! And nobody did it better than him when it came to catching MRT. He saved the day, but he also called it a day at the same time. Judging from how people expressed their gratitude by cursing, accusing him for sabotaging the train and throwing things at him, it was pain and plain to see that he was still pretty much blacklisted. Ignoring the people he just rescued, Atom-Boy made a quick getaway to Kung Pao Chicken and Assorted Szechuan Cuisine restaurant… 

***

The arrival of Atom-Boy startled everybody. He was an unwanted person that happened to be in the wanted list, so the police wanted to arrest him for being unwanted. But Atom-Boy refused to be taken into custody, arguing with the officers that if they wanted to catch him, they would have to capture Uncle-Man first.

Apparently Uncle-Man had been there for nobody knew how long, so it was quite a surprise to Atom-Boy that they simply ignored Uncle-Man’s presence by letting the uncle-like superhero to be there while they immediately chased him like mad. Being treated unjustly, he had blurted out an unnecessary remark he never meant to say about his peer. It did render them speechless for a while, but the spokesperson from the police force came up with a good answer for this: Enrico was not in costume. He appeared as private investigator, a civilian, so there was no reason to seize him. 

Again, it was quite a surprise to Atom-Boy, because if his eyes weren’t lying, Enrico was as fully clothed as himself: a half-smoked cigarette in his mouth, a singlet that was too short to cover his eerily bloated belly button, khaki shorts that exposed his hairy-sturdy legs as a classic symbol of masculinity, a pair of dirty sandals, complete with fungus-smelled feet and some infectious skin disease in between his toes and, finally, an old newspaper that he tucked under his armpit… for God’s sake, Enrico was Uncle-Man! He was supposed to have an impression of a poor uncle that nobody would take notice, so that was how his bloody costume looked like!

Atom-Boy clenched his fists when the police officers insisted on catching him. Just when things were about to get ugly, Uncle-Man stepped in to negotiate a win-win solution. This he did by revealing the secret that Vendy Fendi Lee was indeed Kung Fu and this he did while picking his nose, as if it was no big deal. They looked him in the eye and he stared back at them, an eye for an eye. After that, he burped innocently like a middle-aged uncle should be. 

The very uncle-next-door persona he impersonated did work like a charm. There was this solitude for quite some time, because everybody was busy digesting what he just said. When Atom-Boy couldn’t help bursting into a wild action by pushing Uncle-Man to the wall and shouting angrily at him for selling Kung Fu out, all people in the room were convinced that what he said was true.

While everybody was in the state of shock, it seemed like there was no way Uncle-Man could dodge the upcoming, skull-shattering punch from the enraged Atom-Boy. Thanks to his big mouth for disclosing a private and confidential secret that should have been brought to the grave, he’d be bringing his big mouth to the grave. But Uncle-Man, like all the uncles in the world who were smarter than all the smart alecks in the world, had something up his sleeve. He pressed his MP3 player and…

“Take a look at me now, there’s just an empty space…” sang Phil Collins in such a melancholy tone.

And that caught Atom-Boy unprepared. Before he realized what happened, the illusion had already begun. One second he had a glimpse of Uncle-Man in his typical unclish face –as opposed to childish face– and next, all Atom-Boy could see was a brokenhearted widower, looked years older than he was supposed to be, with a painfully sad story in his eyes. So strong was the emotional effect it drove Atom-Boy to hallucinate that Uncle-Man was always raped by his fat ugly wife and all he could do in the night was to face the wall next to his bed and shed tears silently while his wife, slept beside him, was busy snoring like a pig. So exhausted he was every day he began to suffer from asthma. But even though he was an asthmatic person, he still had to wash all the dishes. And his fingers were all wrinkle and weak because of the detergent, therefore he couldn’t pee properly on the toilet bowl. Once he urinated on the toilet seat, his wife got angry and raped him again. Dissatisfied because of his short time performance, his wife left him for another man with no peeing and breathing problems, thus he became a widower. 

No man could stand such a miserable vision. Even the strongest heart and wicked mind would break down and cry. When Atom-Boy returned to reality, gone was his anger, replaced by sympathy, empathy and pity. He hugged Uncle-Man, caressed his hair, kissed his cheek and whispered silently into his ears, “it’s gonna be alright.” All disputes were soon forgotten. Their relationship started anew. Together they began to examine the death of Kung Fu.

When the police tried to butt in again, to them Uncle-Man said, “today we mourn a great hero who has passed away. Please show some respect by letting us to investigate.”

And this left them no words to argue. Under those watchful eyes, Atom-Boy checked every single angle and after searching here and there, Uncle-Man managed to find a diary called My Diary, A Man’s Best Friend. He passed the book to his curious partner.

As he received the book, Atom-Boy smiled when he read the title. Not only it revealed the sentimental side of the hero, the very human being in him, but judging from a manly handwriting that blended perfectly well with the girly artefact, one could tell the diary did reflect the yin-yang philosophy of its master. It was a really a legacy that only a hero of Kung Fu’s caliber could leave to the world. While gazing at the book cover with full respect, he took a deep breath. After that, he opened the book with his nervous, trembling hands and started reading…

“January 1^st, 2008. Dear Diary, I wet my underpants…

“January 2^nd, 2008. Dear Diary, I wet my underpants…

“January 3^rd, 2008. Dear Diary, I wet my underpants…”

As he kept reading, Atom-Boy shook his head in disbelief. It was painful to read that even the greatest hero succumbed to a very peculiar and disgraceful weakness. The handwriting, while so neat, engraved the agonizing defeat of the writer. There were visible traces of teardrops on some of the pages and Atom-Boy could only imagine that Vendy Fendi Lee was alone in the dead of night, crying for his shameful habit while jotting down the fact that he wet his pants again. He read on, and the content remained the same until the last page, which was, “Dear Diary, I wet my underpants and die…”

Then Atom-Boy closed the book. He felt so embarrassed for reading such a classified information he now wished he had never opened it at the first place. But more than that, Kung Fu’s last words were both enigmatic and prophetic. How could somebody write a thing like that and die? Did he see this coming?

But Uncle-Man begged to differ. He pointed out the fact that the ink smeared on the last alphabet of the word die. This indicated that he died the moment he finished the last sentence and as he delivered the final pen stroke with his last strength, the pen stayed there for quite a while and leaked. This also explained why he was not wearing underwear when he died. It was because he wet them all. Hypothetically, his death could be described like this: Kung Fu always wet his pants while he was sleeping. With this kind of sleeping habit, he damped his crotch more often than not. As a result, he slowly and unknowingly intoxicated his kidneys, ureter, bladder and urethra with various doses of urea from his urine on daily basis. On that very fateful night, when he woke up to write his diary as usual after he wet his pants again, the damage of the vital organs around his crotch were final and so the last word his managed to scribble before he died was the word die.

No analysis could be more impressive than this. Uncle-Man must be a genius for being able to see the slightest possibility beyond the impossibility or he was just a dolt who babbled about nothing in particular. But Atom-Boy listened only half or may be none of it because he happened to spot a suspicious figure peeping from afar. Without further ado, he quickly jumped out of window to chase the mysterious man…

***

It had been written that, “in case of emergency, break the glass.” Now Atom-Boy understood why a superhero wasn’t no cool superhero if he hadn’t fulfilled his destiny by doing the window-breaking action. He felt the adrenaline rushing the moment he broke the window and jumped out while the glass debris was floating midair and sparkling beautifully under the sun. For a split second, he felt like time stood still. The freedom, the sensation, the excitement, all mixed into one. 

Atom-Boy landed lightly on the ground with his cape covering him from the shattered glass while the people around him, with their mouths forming a full “O” shape as a sign of admiration, were subconsciously applauding for his dashing entrance. Atom-Boy couldn’t help smiling. It was great to know that these people still cheered for superhero in action. It had been a while…

And it could be truer than true that it had been a while since he last became a superhero! With zero activity as Atom-Boy, Tom Lee Jones did less exercising but more eating so when the chase was on, soon the adrenaline was gone. Just because he was strong enough to catch MRT, it didn’t mean that he was built for speed. His heart was pounding fast like the sound of double bass and every breath he took was shortened by every step he made. He panted, and when he started running with his tongue sticking out, he realized the fact that the three layers of fat he now had on his belly was not helping him. He cursed, telling himself that he’d been ambushed by carbohydrate. It put weight on him silently! Prior to this, little did he know that to sleep immediately after eating was equal to sleeping with the enemy!

Meanwhile the target managed to widen the distance between them. Atom-Boy would lose him if he didn’t think of something. And it was this time of all times that he remembered a superhero lesson from Confusion, the omnipotent wizard of might and magic from the Silver Age who clearly imitated the wisdom of the sage from folklore. Confusion once told a tale of a father and a son and the moral of the story was, the more the father told the son not to do so, the more the son tried to do so. As a closure, Confusion also said his now immortalized quote: “he who can’t convince must confuse.”

Couldn’t beat his opponent on the running race, Atom-Boy practiced the teaching of Confusion instead. As a tryout, Atom-Boy ordered the stranger to stop and the stranger ran faster! Atom-Boy told him not to turn right, but turn right he did. That was just great, because Atom-Boy knew where the path led to. Finally Atom-Boy warned him not to turn his head around to look at him, but this the escapee also disobeyed. Thus, unaware that he was running toward a dead-end, he banged the wall and tumbled down. Atom-Boy immediately caught him and…

***

Alternate cover of Pheng iu (Volume 1)
Image credit: Zhou Xiong Zhen